Friday Poem #129: I Wish That

Hello, and welcome to this week’s Friday poem. I’m typing this on Thursday, moments before England take on Norway in the FIFA Women’s World Cup Quarter-Final. I hope that they will get through to the Semi-Finals, but also know that nothing is certain in the World Cup – and certainly if you are an England team.

Generally, I now only see any Football at such tournaments. Football has a great deal of people who are quick to put it down – the inflated player salaries, the cheating, the spitting, the way players fall down at the slightest touch. I often see meme’s comparing footballers to Rugby players, or soldiers, highlighting the many flaws about ‘the beautiful game’.

Personally, I do think players are paid too much, and there is too much ‘simulation’ going on in Football. Thankfully, it does at present only seem localised in the men’s game. From the games I have seen thus far in the Women’s World Cup, there has been much less of the negative aspects we associate with the men’s game.
What I do see in both the Women’s and Men’s games still are passion, skill and moments of incredible drama that always has me screaming at the television when I watch them. The World Cup is the only time that I can shout “Stamp on their cheating faces!!” in seventeen languages and not feel bad.

Although, I do also do that during the Eurovision song contest.

Anyway, on to this week’s Friday poem. It is another attempt at a new style of poetry for me, and the subject is based on some personal things I have going on at times in my life. I recently heard some poetry that, although incredibly personal to the performer, it struck a chord with me to.
This poem is personal to me, but I know that many people have similar feelings.

Here it is – I hope you like it.

I Wish That

I wish that

I didn’t have to work so hard

To not be fat

I wish that I had more hair

Here, not there

I wish that I wasn’t so insecure

So when it comes to what others think

I really wouldn’t care.

I wish that

I didn’t see myself as a failure

And that I’ll never be all that.

I wish my inner voice wouldn’t tell me it’s a fact

And that despite me trying not to

I’m desperately hoping

That you’ll approve

Because I need you to

But if your appreciation doesn’t filter through

My self belief bleeds into

A river of silence and is washed away.

I wish that 

I hadn’t bitten my tongue

As I tried to think of these words 

And say them out loud but 

They just wouldn’t come

So I bit my tongue

Just for fun perhaps, or maybe

As a warning of punishments yet to come.

I wish that I was as important

As the person in the car behind me Driving home tonight

Who was so desperate to get past

So fast

They clearly had more influence

That needed to be driven up my arse.

I wish that life was easy

But then at times I don’t

Ironically it’s when life is going well

That I leave those thoughts alone.

I wish that I was braver

Or at least a little less scared

I wish that I didn’t face every new thing

Feeling so very unprepared.

I wish that, at times

I didn’t wish that I was someone else.

But I do.

Sometimes.

I wish that.

I wish that.

Don’t forget that Volumes One and Two of “The Friday Poems” are available to buy from Amazon!

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